What is it about closure that is so satisfying
Is it the pain that stabbed when I
Read the one line I never wanted to read
The painful words I never wanted to hear
The brutal rejection that cut through me
The psychotic behavior that forced a result
That pushed your boundaries and
Pushed until finally you could take no more
Until finally you could take a stand
Until finally all the superficial niceties
The false fake sweet kind words
Evaporated
Fell away
And all that remained was a defiant
Rejection of all things that are me
What is it that is so satisfying
That shuts me down
That stills my conflict
And allows me to rest?
I wish I knew
I wish it wasn’t so
But now it’s over
I am full with a perverse satisfaction
That bears no apologetic shame
And finally I can
Heal.
Poems and Petals 
It’s hurts
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It does
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That, i can relate..😢
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I’m sorry to hear that
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No, it’s okay.. ☺😁
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The word psychotic is interesting here. Was the speaker I’ll? Or just crazy? Either way she doesn’t seem to care about her behaviour as his was so much worse. She’s free and that’s the best part, she can “heal” as you write. I think maybe sometimes acting crazy is a defence in place to get rid of those who harm us. Well written and powerful words 🙂 Hope All is well Vonita 💕🙏🏻
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Hi Mandi, I love your insightful comments, especially the thought around acting crazy as a defense to rid ourselves of those who harm us. The word psychotic was used as an illustration of exactly that. An otherwjse sane rational person driven to destructive irrational behavior as a means of protection, and once rejected unambiguously can then begin to heal. There is a strange sweet satisfaction at finally and eventually arriving at that place where all the niceties are over, and there is a line drawn in the sand. At least everyone then knows where they stand, instead of a painful longing false hope and expectation. If any of that makes sense!
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Yes I get what your saying. Not knowing can be difficult to deal with. Maybe that causes the crazy?
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This hits home…to the core
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Thank you for reading. I’m sorry to hear that though x
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