On Friday I encountered two situations that would have triggered meltdowns. Not one meltdown, but I would have gone straight from one into another. Things that happened that are my trigger points for sure. Those situations – a comment from someone, a fear of missing out, of rejection, of abandonment came rushing to the fore.
But I am healed and healing. If I ever wondered if I needed to be on medication, now I can testify how much it has helped. I was able to acknowledge those situations, identify that they are trigger points for me, that they would have had power over me in the previous days, and set them aside. Continue with my day.
I have been reduced so many times in the past to tears. The trigger points that invoke a pain inside that shortcut any rational thought. I would be overcome. But on Friday I was not overcome. And it felt good. Empowering.
I was addicted
To a love that never was
Waiting for your touch
Craving each discarded crumb
My highs and lows diverting pain
The rejection I feared with all my soul
Rejection I forced into being
The rejection that finally gave way
To the deep well of love
The love inside of me