First Crush

Vonita

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In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “First Crush.”

My first crush was a boy by the name of Paul (middle row third from left, age 8). I was standing directly to the left of him. Not looking too happy in my new school. I had a crush on him from the age of twelve. My mother suggested that since it was now 1986 and not the dark ages (#feminism), perhaps I should invite him ice-skating. (Advice I would never give my daughter, men must take the lead!) So I called him (his older sister was friends with my sister so I had access to his landline). He put me on hold so he could go and ask his mother. She said no. At school on Monday he joked about it with the others in the class. (I asked him out, how dare I!) I learnt my lesson well.

Advice to my daughter:
No asking boys or men out! Attract them if you must, but they must pursue! End of story.

24 thoughts on “First Crush”

    1. Yes, I sure felt silly at school the following week! As fate would have it, I went to the same school as his three sisters, and we became part of the same social group for a while (the ice-skating incident was never mentioned again!) Nothing ever progressed between us, it’s all a long time ago now.

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  6. Pingback: Growing up in South Africa | Passion through Poetry

  7. Oh Wow! At that age, you must have felt really low! 😔 I am very conservative by my nature and I believe in guys taking the lead and doing the chasing else…no dice! I’d just keep my feelings all locked and bottled up!😈😆 I’d be so damned if I allowed for any to pull that nasty bit on me! Guys are hunters and should rightly be but you were brave and spunky though…his loss! 😉

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  10. Absolutely! While this post is somewhat sad, it is quite liberating to know ‘m not the only one who thinks the way I think.

    I have tried to let people see that when women do the asking (more often than not, because of course, there’ll be exceptions), we stand to feed the ego of men… who seem to always be waiting for that minute opportunity to float and burst all over.

    Even sometimes, making them become aware of you might not quite cut it. I just feel if he didn’t see me in the first place, making him notice me won’t make such a difference!

    Nice one Vonita! You might want to check the post about my first crush- https://minisculediary.wordpress.com/2015/09/06/crushed/ too. Haha. I’d so love to know what you think! 🙂

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  12. I was sad for you and it seemed like he wanted to go with you or why did he ask his mother? He could have just said No. I wonder why he chose to let others know? I have two brothers and one has been married to my SIL for 25 years. He says the sweetest things like, “I just didn’t think I would be in her league” and another cute one is, “Yeah, when all the other 89 year old women are sitting by themselves, my wife will be in her rocking chair beside me!” They are almost 15 years apart, she is older. It was this promotion that had me tell a guy at my work 10 months ago that I would like to watch a football game (Cleveland Browns) with him. He is very nice and also younger than I am. Hope his Christmas card comes true, “May it be the first of many more Christmases together.” He bought me a beautiful art portfolio and a set of brushes, watercolors, acrylics, pastels, chalks and colored pencils. Only one of my past boyfriends or husbands ever came close to knowing how much I wished for them to really “get” me.

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