Frivolous Spending

Vonita

Recently I have been challenged to consider my belief systems, and long-held ideas that form part of who I am. I have always ‘played it safe’, not taking unnecessary risks and trying to live responsibly. A.k.a suppressing my inner self. Last week I booked overseas flights that were being advertised on a sale, and have been trying to plan a holiday. In between all of this, I have been struggling with feelings of guilt. Growing up, my family were not wealthy. My mother had to budget responsibly, as did my grandmother. My mother-in-law was the same. So an unnecessary overseas family holiday falls squarely in the ‘frivolous spending’ category. A family member with whom I shared my plans, used that exact term – cautioning that frivolous spending can add stress to a marriage. My husband has been fairly quiet on the matter, not telling me that I am evil and shouldn’t have acted so impulsively, but if we are indeed going then he would like to see Yosemite. Because what’s the point of going and not seeing Yosemite. (One night or two, my darling? Two will be better. Done!) But I still can’t shake the feelings of guilt. My father could use the money. He has health issues. We could save the money. Keep it rather for a rainy day. Yes, so it can water our graves when we are dead and buried and pushing up daisies. A trusted colleague at work was a bit more kind – get over yourself and give yourself a break, you both work for goodness sake. And it’s family memories and time that cannot be redeemed at a later date. It is a different viewpoint from what I have been brought up with. And just as valid. Now for me to accept it!

14 thoughts on “Frivolous Spending”

  1. Having just returned from an overseas trip I know it’s costly. But I am so glad I went. And during the trip there was a decision to be made that involved more expenditure (unexpected) but necessary. It’s hard to not hear the voices of disapproval in your head or out loud. Go and enjoy the memory making. It’s essential for the soul. It will be an effort and maybe uncomfortable at times but I promise you, it’s worth it!

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    1. Thank you so much! It seems I spend so much of my life having a wish list, and not making any of them become true, and before we know it, our health, energy and time will be gone. Thank you for empathising, and wonderful to hear about your experience. Where did you go if I may ask?

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      1. I went to Croatia and Austria with my daughter and her 4 month old. We visited my son and his family. The unexpected expense came on the return from Austria, as the train borders were closed and it got complicated. I bought pricey airline tickets but don’t regret it for a second. Hope the “parade rainers” keep their spirit-dampening thoughts to themselves. I’m with your trusted colleague!

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      2. Thank you so much! Really appreciate your support, and your own travels sound like they were wonderful (even with the change of plans)! ❤

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  2. We only have one shot at this life we need to make the best of it. Do not feel quilty for enjoying your life. I want to arrive at the pearly gates (hopefully) exhausted and screaming “whoo hoo, what a ride!”

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  4. I traveled and saw the world, I have visited places that many dream of visiting. Now, while getting older I realize how much these travels have formed me as a human being. It has widened my horizon and I wouldn’t trade in for anything else.

    Life is short, live it.

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  5. Vonita, please don’t feel guilty. You can feel anything but guilty as it is the lowest form of feeling. Plan it out (accordingly), I’m sure you’ll be able to go. At the end don’t worry much.

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