Privacy

May 31, 2015May 31, 2015 22 Comments

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Do Not Disturb.”

I don’t blog photos of my children or my husband. I have blogged a baby photo of them each (and my daughter in my post Mud and Fun), I asked my husband first if I could, and he was fine with me doing that. He said they could be any babies really. And in Mud and Fun my daughter is literally covered in mud.

The good thing with poetry is that it is just poetry. Most of my writing is based on what I feel, but at times I tap into moments past for inspiration. I used to publicize on google-plus but my husband used to click on random posts and then quiz me on them. I stopped the publicize except on Twitter and sometimes I post to FB. I could post anonymously but don’t feel strongly that my writing needs to be hidden. I don’t have many skeletons in my closet. I do have a few LOL, hopefully they will stay hidden!

Learning to Read

May 26, 2015May 26, 2015Vonita 9 Comments

I taught myself to read by filling in the gaps. As soon as I had “the cat sat on the mat” covered, I deemed myself sufficiently capable of reading chapter books. My sister and her friends were always reading chapter books and looking very grown up. So I grabbed her copy of the Enchanted Wood and started filling in the gaps. I got stuck on the word “bush”. No idea how to read the SH. Until! A few pages in there was a picture of the mushroom stools. They would pop out of the ground and form very useful fairy seats. And look at that! I could match the mushroom word with the picture and right there was a pattern. Mush and bush. But bush rhyming with mush doesn’t make any sense. But pronounced differently (with a U sound), it becomes bush! And that is how I figured out the SH sound. And how to read “bush”.

Childhood

May 25, 2015Vonita 25 Comments

My Graduation, May 1996

I couldn’t speak as a child. I guess it is called “being mute”. My sister used to speak on my behalf. If I wanted a sandwich or something to eat, my sister would ask my mother. When I was about five, I was taken for speech therapy. I had to complete exercises at home. My mother would ask me to fetch three things from her bedroom – book, slippers, pjs. I would go to the bedroom and have to try and remember the three items. I remember having to go back a few times to ask her to repeat the items. My Dad told me last year it was suggested I attend a “special needs” school. My father refused. I was held back and started school a year late. By that time I was able to speak, and after learning a few words I went off and taught myself to read Enid Blyton’s “Enchanted Wood”. I was the first child in the Grade to be able to read fluently, and that was with no extra help. And ever since then I was fairly academic. I did well in my grades, and graduated with an Honours degree in Computer Science and Applied Maths. But every so often, remnants of my shortcomings crop up. Like Saturday for instance. I started painting a “Paint By Numbers” set, easy as. There’s the template, all laid out and numbered, and the little paint boxes all numbered, and paintbrush. But then! Some of the sections had two or three numbers on them. What? Now what? What do I do now? Hmmm. I turned the cover over, and no instructions. Do I paint the first layer and then add a second layer on top? I’m confused. Eventually I had to turn to my nine-year-old. What do I do if there are two or three numbers appearing together. Then what? Oh, you mix them! Ah.

Bullying

May 22, 2015May 22, 2015Vonita 14 Comments

I just read a bullying comment. Not on my blog, but on a blog I follow. I read the blog post and found it quite interesting – nothing offensive about it. Merely someone posing a question. Read / don’t read. Follow / don’t follow. But Why would someone gain pleasure in leaving a horrible, mean, sarcastic comment? Does it make them feel better? Give them a rush? I don’t get it. And especially, and I don’t mean to offend, when it is a man being disrespectful to a woman. Men have always had the physical advantage over women. They always will have. So be nice about it. Us women have to play amongst the lions every single day, and hope we don’t get attacked.

Weddings

May 21, 2015May 22, 2015Vonita 25 Comments

My Egyptian colleague is getting married in a couple of month’s time. He was sharing with me how expensive weddings are in Egypt. The cost involved with hairdressers and makeup and dresses and photographers is exorbitantly high. Weddings in Australia can also be very OTT (over-the-top). Overseas weddings held in exotic locations are becoming increasingly popular.

My wedding was a simple affair. My best friend styled my hair, and I applied my own minimal makeup (touch of mascara and lipstick). A friend of my husband’s did our photography. I bought my dress and shoes in my lunch hour. My dress was a cocktail dress that I enhanced to have the matching chiffon scarf attached as long, flowing sleeves. The dress was from a boutique store and imported from Canada. I loved it straight away and it fitted perfectly, so I bought it on the spot! It is a warm ivory colour, not ice-white.

My husband does not dance so we had a lunchtime garden wedding. It was held in January which is summertime in southern hemisphere land. The sun shone that day. We are still married and have happy, healthy children, so safe to say the sun is still shining!

Being Mean

May 18, 2015May 18, 2015Vonita 24 Comments

A few days ago, I was upset at a comment a friend sent to me in an email. I consulted with a trusted friend (BFF!), and responded in a fashion that gave me the upper hand. In the middle of the night I woke up, and in that dream-like state, I sent a note flipping the situation around. Restoring dignity to another, and making myself less. I have spent the most of today wondering why did I do that? Why did I give the other person the upper hand, at the expense of my own ego? My ego would prefer to hold the power. Now after reflection, I am soulfully glad. I am not a mean person. I don’t enjoy seeing others suffer. My reaction to a situation in a half-asleep state is a reflection of who I inherently am. And when ego is set aside, it is who I would rather be. Peace be unto others, and peace be unto myself.

Finding Peace

May 18, 2015May 18, 2015Vonita 23 Comments

My moods have been up and down lately. Trying to talk myself into a better space, but always fighting this inner discontent. Have no idea how to fix it. I went to the cinema with my BFF this morning, we watched BoyChoir, I really loved the music. We had lunch with her mum. It was lovely. But as soon as I was alone, it all came tumbling back. My discord, disharmony, my struggle with life. What will make me happy? Is it really about happiness? Or an inner contentment, a spiritual peace? I seem to have none of these.

Very thankful for all the kind souls who have reached out, and left a kind word. Even written poems. From all different parts of the world, and varying life stories. We all have our own journey to walk. I am so blessed in many ways, it feels unthankful to have this feeling inside of me. This feeling I cannot seem to shake. It is there when I go to sleep, and when I wake up. When I live my day, when I am busy, and when I am still. Even now as I go about my daily tasks (work-free Monday), I cannot shake it off. And I have no more poetry! I cannot write another poem on ups and downs, and my roller coaster life.

And the worst part is, a caring friend asked me today — Vonita, what will make you happy? I have no idea! (A new life? No life? A new profession? Work? No work?) My moods were stable when I was on a four-month break. I was a different person. Content, happy, doing pilates, writing, photo challenges, focus-on-family. Now I have strife, turmoil, anxiety, stress, lack of time, focus-off-family, chaos.

My answer to what will make me happy? I have no idea. Write about it until I am dead in the grave. Pray. Get on my knees, and pray for contentment. A spiritual peace is not always about being happy.

Maybe I will put the poetry aside for awhile, and free write?

❤

Style

May 15, 2015May 15, 2015 12 Comments

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “The Clothes (May) Make the (Wo)man.”

I have four sets of clothes:
Casual summer
Work summer
Casual winter
Work winter

I wear a lot of skirts and styled dresses. Heels to work and flats at home.

This is what I wore yesterday. I felt so good I took a selfie (lol, tmi!) 🙂 spotty dotty black teeny weeny polka dots. With designer boots 😉

Today I’m wearing an LBD (little black dress) with a purple pendant tied with ribbons.

Window into my world!

Writing on Demand

May 14, 2015May 14, 2015Vonita 12 Comments

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Land of Confusion.”

I am doing a writing course. But I have not been able to write anything!
When I am asked to write something for an assignment, I cannot. There are simply no words. Blank space. Vapor. At the moment we are workshopping around the room and I have nothing. Nothing at all! I cannot write on demand.