My late mil (mother-in-law) often used to start her sentences with ‘the main thing is’. Followed by what the main thing would be for that particular day.

A few years back I went through an experience that broke me. My children were both young, my daughter was one year and a bit. My husband was on a contract in Melbourne, and I was alone with my children in Johannesburg. I was alone.

I went through an experience that broke my soul. That changed how I think about things. How I see the world and people. And left me with a wound. On a deeper, more spiritual level. I was left floundering, pained, hurt, wounded.

I am still trying to heal that wound. I am still seeking validation outside of me. I am still looking to others to validate me. And I realized today I don’t need others to validate me. I don’t need to look outside myself. I don’t need to fulfill the expectations that others might have of me. I don’t need to fill shoes that others have decided I should fill.

And it so clearly came to mind, the main thing is:

I am me, and I am okay.