Well, I’m not doing a very good job at fighting it. Always seem to wake up in a low mood, and stay in a low mood. I miss people and interaction. Extended family. My sister, nieces, my mother-in-law who passed but I still miss chatting to her, school friends, old friends who have moved away. 

I used to love visiting my mother-in-law and staying the night. She was very easy to chat to. I used to wonder who will I chat to when she is no longer here. 

I feel jealousy over a friend who moved to Sydney, and automatically included in a few social circles. My longing for social interaction is so strong. My low moods and awkward social skills probably don’t help. I have bad habits. Like staring at people, sometimes I fixate on something, and don’t realize I’m staring at that person. It happened the other day at the office. There were two people chatting beside me and I looked over at one of them. I didn’t realize I was staring until she called me out on it. I’m sorry, she said, are we talking too loud? Um, no. I turned back to my computer.

Anyway, I guess it is the season where many people feel some loss.