I’m having a bad hair day, said I. Not only that but a bad shoe day as well, and in general I’m having a bad day.
Find your voice, I was told. I never knew my voice was lost, thought I.
And so it was, and so it is, the cycle repeats and my fears arise. My eyes are the first to react. My tightening heart forces the tears to form. Watery pools surface the lens of my sight. I’m triggered and I know it and feel it. I’m living my fear and that’s okay.
I will live it and allow it to be.
I love me.
The winds have carried me here
Wrapped gently in their nurturing arms
Nowhere to run nowhere to hide
Just a peaceful quiet
To lay me down.
What would my testimony be, asked I
I took a moment to reflect
I stole some time to think it through:
I’ve cried I wept I faltered, failed
But always, always I held on
To sparkling glittering shimmering hope
For hope it is that is the fuel
That keeps our dreams alive
And more than that it guides our steps
That take us to the
Other side.
I’m doing good real good
I wanted you to know
That past the tears and heartache
My heart has overflowed
For wishes have been filled
The help I needed so
Flowed freely from
A gracious hand I know
Step outside to freedom
A small chance to take
Loose your hold on comfort
You will find the gold
Courage not forsaken
Only time will tell
Privilege awaits you
When you step outside your
Zone.
Icy winds rattled glass windows
Dogs howled misery at the relentless moon
My eyes grew heavy until eventually there
Was nothing left bar a tiny seed, very tiny send of
Hope
Peace wash over me
Peace I pray
Keep me safe
Never let me stray
For all my steps
I will walk today
For choice of words
I might have to say
Peace wash over me
Peace, I pray
I chose my path and here I am
I chose each step I took
I shook my world right from its core
My days are now unseen
Where to now I do not know
But trust in faith I will
By faith we live each day
Surrounded by our hoping hearts
We trust that all would go our way
That dreams would light the dimming stars
Before we have a chance to blink
We fall and falter at the realm
My legs give way I feel so weak
I hope that you will understand
I give it all I tried my best
It was returned at their behest
My very all would never be enough
And so I turn myself away
There’s nothing more I have
To say.
I felt that pain so deeply
A sear within my chest
I cried out for drops of water
The sun though lapped it all
Oh please can someone help me
Oh please don’t let me die!
But down the hole I falter
I lose the sight of sky
I’m surrounded by my demons
My head falls into hands
And so I wish for blindness
To unsee all the pain
Oh heal my heart I pray
Let the sun shine once again
Poems and Petals 