“Money can’t buy happiness” they said
But in all that time of stress and strife
An income sure would help my life
So I lowered my head and did what I could
To gather some coins and reams of yarn
I knitted a scarf of grey and blue –
Money can’t buy happiness it’s true
Though it can pay rent and food and wool.
I am dragged from a
Bottomless ocean
To cough out thick
Slime-coated grunge
And as my body is purged
From a suffocating
Ribbon of weed –
I finally –
I finally am happy
What is the key to happiness? A question presented to myself and others today.
It was interesting to hear the responses. Family, relationships, health, loving what you do, life moments etc.
I came home and asked my children the question. My daughter, without skipping a beat, said simply “family”. I prompted her on it. She said to me family keeps you safe and happy. It does indeed.
My son replied with ‘meditation’. I asked him what does he know about meditation? He replied by saying ‘nothing, but that’s what he learnt in his religion class at school’. Fair enough!
What is the key to my happiness? I have spent years in anxiety and depression. Perhaps it sounds cynical to say the key to my happiness is my SSRI medication.
And recently it is public speaking. Public speaking and poetry makes me happy.
As well as hot tea, reading, writing and my cosy bed. The simple things in life.
For things that make me happy
Like guitar strings being strummed
Like music playing
Like my warm cosy bed
Like coffee
Like cake yum I love cake
Like a Johannesburg thunderstorm
Like watching movies on an airplane
Like every pay day, yay for pay days
Like swimming in the sea
Like massages
Like my hair being brushed
Like new clothes days
Like the quietness when I am still at night
And all I feel is peace and quiet
And I am safe and loved.
I woke to a morning song
Of birds singing in their tree
And felt a gladness to be part
Of this magical world we share
For even when we cry our tears
And cover our heads in black
Birds will sing their songs to us
To lead happiness gently back
Walking home and I am happy
No sugar crushes for me today
No highs and devastating lows
Just a simple happiness
I persevered with happiness
And now happiness is running dry
End of day looms large
I will rest
Knowing that
I have done all I can
I will tell you what I do when I’m not having fun anymore
I reveal my heart in the words that I write
I will tell you what my plans are to fill the gaps in my heart
My plans are to write the gaps into words
I will tell you what is left of my time on this earth
To find a blessing in the sun, and the birds and the creation of which we are one
I will tell you about the hidden demons, and the strange and discreet unease inside
For the demons lurk, always in the shadows, even out of sight they make themselves known
To torture and to bring me to my knees, to a place where no help could be offered from this world, forcing me to seek inside myself
I can tell you about my sorrows, my nostalgia, my first love and my first kiss
Because each moment is written in my soul, the good moments and the bad, are woven to form a part of me
I can admit that I have traded my soul for a flat life, that I have tamed my wildness for security, and have worshipped forced interactions instead of celebrating the rawness within
Of which there is so much passion, there is so much yearning, so much longing, so much desire that is kept chained, with their only freedom being in the words that I pen
And I can tell you that it is time, time to wake up to the fact that I am here to Be, not to Become
In response to a poem by Majd Radwan from Sonderpath
https://sonderpath.wordpress.com/2015/10/17/tell-me-its-time-to-change/
If happiness is a choice
Then through my life experience
Conflicts and strife
I will simply choose
Myself happy
The sky shifted
When I wasn’t looking
Overcast grey clouds
Heavy burdened awareness
Of darkness approaching
Lifted
Out of nowhere
The sun is shining
Caressing my skin
Licking, teasing, touching
And out of nowhere
I feel happy
Poems and Petals 