How good is it to have clearly-defined and healthy boundaries?
I have a colleague friend whom I have texted privately on occasion, sometimes my friend would reply and sometimes not. But would always speak to me on our work Skype accounts.
Yesterday I was ill in bed and not logged into my work account. I whatsapped to say I am sick and cold and maybe I will play candy crush on my mobile.
My friend replied with a somewhat terse, “please do not whatsapp, keep it to Skype only”.
At first I was taken aback and felt a bit shocked inside.
And then I thought, well, it is good to know that person’s boundaries. I can then respect those boundaries. Much better than ghosting me. Actually more respectful too. I hadn’t figured that we could quite openly communicate on one communication device and not on another.
But at least now I know.
A kind friend mentioned in a comment here on WP that pushing people away is a defense mechanism. This thought has really stayed with me today. It is something that I tend to do. My face shows all my emotion. When I am happy, it shows. When I am sad, it shows. This morning a colleague friend of mine picked me out for having an angry face. One doesn’t have to look at your face for very long to know that something has made you angry, he told me. I am angry. I am angry that there are a few people that I have allowed to influence my emotion. And when I decide to take a stand, it feels liberating for a day or two, and after that I felt utter remorse. I feel angry for the way I deal with certain situations. Someone mentioned it is like I don’t trust in my own decision-making. And I don’t! Not at all. For I know that my decision today may come back to haunt me tomorrow. I push people away so that I will not get hurt. But in doing so, I get hurt anyway.
Everyone is so encouraging here on WordPress. I feel so much love and support and encouragement. It really lifts me up, thank you ❤
In response to The Daily Post’s weekly photo challenge: “Boundaries.”
To be moulded
Against the boundaries
Imposed upon the nature
Of nature’s free will
I asked you to stay away
I asked you not to touch
I asked you to never stray
It wasn’t very much
So next time you want
To draw very near
Next time you long
To drift over here
I took a risk in creating a blog
Only ever having read a few cooking blogs before
Not knowing what I will do with a blog
But feeling that it was needing to be born
So I created a blog, and gave it a name
And published a few words to begin
Poor baby blog was then discarded at will
For a while, maybe nine months at that
But waited patiently for me to return
It took a short while, but I never forgot
About a blog waiting silently for new life,
I returned to breathe words once again
So here I am, and there is so much to learn
And every new day, I will now joyfully embrace –
Every new post, every new thought, every new word
That flows from my heart, that my blog can display!