Tag blogging

Growing

Vonita 13 Comments

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Yesterday I wrote about all the qualities I would like my daughter to have. Confidence, leadership, self-esteem etc. And ended my post by concluding that she is everything I am not. I have updated the conclusion to add that I can grow to have those qualities too. If we are alive we are either growing or dying. I am not dead or dying. I can still grow to have those qualities I feel I lack. Truth is, I am stronger than I believe. I had the courage to move my family to a safer country. To leave everything I knew behind. My life, my home, my work, my family, and start a life in a new world. I have had the courage to say no to my children, and discipline them when required. I have the courage to be honest with myself, and I have the courage to grow.

Match-maker

Vonita 9 Comments

A post I read yesterday took me back a few years. There is only one blogger I know in real life and she is the author of Reaching Meadow Lane.

The person she wrote about in her blog post yesterday was someone who joined our company at a very special time in my life. I was single and had finally accepted my fate. He started in the January of 2001, and his first task was to manage an IT project I had been assigned to. Along with two engineers who had recently joined our company. I remember walking into the kitchen and the manager lamented the fact that he had no “cooking clue” what he was doing in his new role outside of the military. Oh don’t worry about that, I quickly replied, I never have a cooking clue! A quote that stuck!
The four of us worked on the project in the jan, feb and March of that year. The project was successful and the two engineers and myself were given complimentary movie tickets “on the project”. A little match-making, I daresay 😉 Towards the end of March my one colleague started waiting for me in the basement so he could carry my laptop for me. Ha! On the 1st of April, a Sunday, we entered into a relationship. Up until that point he had been trying his best to remain a bachelor. Double ha! Gotcha! The following January we married, and are now living our happily ever after.

Congrats on the news in the US that those who would like to take the step of commitment may now have the opportunity to do so.

Inspired by the following post:
https://reachingmeadowlane.wordpress.com/2015/06/25/military-man-protection/

Being Secure

6 Comments

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Take It From Me.”

This morning I feel insecure. It is a feeling inside that makes me feel like I am not anchored. Like I am floating in the wind. Floating higher when winds are light and breezy, and sinking lower when the winds begin to change. Leaving me deflated and questioning everything about myself.

I try and teach my daughter to be the leader of her life. Possess confidence, self-esteem, be secure in herself, not be subject to opinions of others, to know her own mind. So far, she is all of these things. I was too scared to speak to people when I was her age. I’m still reserved in person. I love having others around me. But am reserved in my interactions. My daughter is confident and self-assured – everything I am not. I can grow to be those things too.

My Purpose in Life

Vonita 15 Comments

When I was a child, I used to dream of being a mother and having babies. In high school I dreamt of getting high grades, and put as much effort as I could to do as well as I could. But my career ambitions seemed to stop at that point. I wanted a job in which I could earn enough to support myself, and give me something to do. And not be bored out of my mind. (I was granted that wish!). But that was about the extent of my career ambitions. My head was too much in *romance*. I went to a convent and had zero interaction with males. No joke. I never knew any my age. At fifteen I kissed a boy at a school disco. I had only just met him that night. My mother found out (because *somebody* told her), and it was awful being lectured by her. No kissing boys you don’t know. No kissing boys! (Can I go now?). Alas, I never heard from the lucky guy again. Though I dreamt and prayed that he would call. He had memorised my number after all. Oh, the perils of convent life.

When I was all of 24 and single I was asked the question what do I dream about for my career. I could only reply by saying I dream about getting married to a good man, and having children. I do not dream about careers. (Hmm, CLM (career limiting move) much?) It took a couple more years.

And now, I love being around my children. One aspect of my mothering skills is that I do not and have never patronized them. I do not fuss. I always treated my children with respect. The sooner they could do things for themselves and take responsibility, the better. They are both great kids. Loving, respectful, responsible, easy to be around.

Nowadays when I dream about my future, I dream about writing to my heart’s content, doing Pilates at my local gym on weekday mornings, grandkids in some distant future, spending time with my BFF, and just being me. Not the me that struggles with everything everyday. Always feeling manic and out of control.

I would love to travel to a few places. The U.S., see my family in South Africa again, Canadian rocky mountains, Europe etc!

And I still dream about romance.

Inspired by the following post:
The What For

Snapshot Stories

25 Comments

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In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Snapshot Stories.”

A few years ago I was invited to a ’50s Glamour party for a friend’s 40th birthday. My friend was a South African living in Sydney for a few years. We had been friends in South Africa a long time ago. The dress I wore was bought in Johannesburg in December 2000. The party was lovely. That particular friend has the most warm, lovely friendly disposition. She now lives in Cape Town.

Toy Story

5 Comments

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Toy Story.”

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My favorite toy was a doll my maternal grandmother sent to me from Cape Town. It arrived in a box complete with knitted clothes and bonnet. In Afrikaans they have a lovely word for bonnet – “koppie kappie”. Which directly translated reads a small head covering. It is one of a few items I have kept from my childhood. She is now under my daughter’s protective care.

There is a little musical box embedded into her at the back. A tiny record fitted into it and would play some music. One day the neighborhood boys grabbed my doll and ripped the record out. I remember two of their names. Ryan and Brendan. You have been shamed! I must have been five or younger, as we were living in a house and after that we moved to an apartment. I was five when I broke my collarbone and that happened when I was in the apartment.

I Believe In Love

Vonita 6 Comments

“There’s more room in a broken heart”
Coming Around Again – Carly Simon

Introducing myself to the world

Vonita 5 Comments

A voice against drugs, from someone who is paying the price. If any readers recall my 72 Hour post and Execution Night, please do support this soul in his writing.

Tan-Nguyen's avatartannguyen

I felt that there was something I had forgotten to do. I was reading the blogs of others and I realised that they all had introduced themselves. Well here is mine. Sorry for the lateness.

My name is Tan Duc Thanh Nguyen. Hmm. It’s a complicated introduction to make. Mainly because I am not meant to let it be known I have accessed online. And secondly, how to say I am in jail, serving out a life sentence in a foreign country. Well that wasn’t so awkward. It was really really weird. In April 29th of this year, two Australians were executed by firing squad. It has been haunting me ever since.

Our crime was attempting to smuggler drugs from some country back home. We got arrested. Ten years later, the executions took place. It was something I thought wouldn’t happen, but it did. I know that I had committed…

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Passion Through Poetry

2 Comments

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “All About Me.”

My blog was originally Moving Towards The Light, based on my very first poem The Light. After a couple of months of initial blogging, I ran out of ideas and inspiration and my blog became dormant.
I resurrected it a few months later when my mood dropped and I needed to write. It was at the same time that Robin Williams passed away and I watched Dead Poets Society. In one scene he tells his students – we have poetry in us because we have passion. These words kept on repeating in my mind. I have poetry in me because I have passion. Passion, poetry, poetry, passion. Passion through Poetry.

I’ve included my initial gravatar. My aunt created it for me based on a king protea photograph.
It was edited to form the cover of my personal edition book.

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My Dad

Vonita 12 Comments

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My father loves to give gifts. It is one of his love languages. We always knew that we would be spoilt at Christmas time if my father had anything to do with it. My grandmother used to tell us a story that when he was a small boy he only had a few coins, but went off on his own to the local store. On Christmas Day he presented both his parents with a gift. His father was presented with a handy light bulb and she received a tin of peas. The last gift I received from my father was a perfume for my birthday last year. I don’t see him very often now as he lives in Johannesburg.
My parents were on holiday in the UK when my mother passed away. They were to celebrate their 25th wedding anniversary that year. He had to endure a long haul flight back home without his wife.
On Sunday mornings my dad used to play his music and cook breakfast.
I miss those mornings and the sometimes happy family times we shared.