It was only through loving you that I learnt to love myself.
It was only through giving all that I had that I learnt to take in return.
It was only by accepting what you had to give that I learnt to say thank you.
It was only.
And it still is.
It is still.
You.
I hold my pain as a soft, vulnerable gift and allow it to be. For everything that I am and everything I have ever been is as delicate as a bubble that has been crafted with the most extraordinary care that allows it to be, and for all of my shortcomings and failures, there is victory too, and with every breath that I take, I simply am.
I’m drowning in a pool of my own despair, the anchor has taken hold of my soul and I cannot breath I see the light above I know there is hope as I give way to a pit of dark sinking sand.
Rainbows and feathers
Hold us in their palm
Lighting a darkened sky
Saving us from harm
When my eyes are down
And sorrow fills the day
Feathers and rainbows
Brighten up the way!
I can taste you without tasting you
I can feel you without feeling you
I can hear you without listening
I can see without seeing you.
Still my flesh craves
To make you
Wholly
Mine.
What is it about you that gave you all the power to sweep in unawares and infiltrate my mind with longings and desires of you by my side?
Shy petals and rain –
Flirtatious kiss between parched
Earth and her heaven
How to cope when you don’t know how to cope?
Stop the stories.
Stop the projections
Stop the comparisons.
And simply do
What needs to be done today.
Change has the power to strip me naked baring my exposed flesh to a glaring world.
I will gather up leaves – authentic, sturdy, and vibrant and clothe myself again.
I made a decision to change my life and now it feels crazy weird and I feel crazy weird and nothing feels normal anymore and so I need to get used to a new normal. I dare not look back because there is nothing to look back to.
Poems and Petals 