I need a structure to my day
I need to know the words to say
I need a routine to the hours
I need the letters to write a prose
I need a frame I cannot cope
Without a structure or a rope
Something to hold on tight
Something to see me through the night
My mind is turmoiled I’m at sea
Floundering floundering
Please help me
I’m so scared
A tiny child curled up in a ball
Fearing the world
What it can do
I’m so scared
I dare not open my eyes
For what I might see
And cannot erase
I’m so scared
For a lost chance
My unknown future
Thrown away by the fickleness of
Wind
Imagine throwing my life away
All the chances that came my way
Why do I suffer like I do
Mental anguish, feeling blue
Perfect life, job, lot
Cast aside, a blood-stained spot.
Could you love me if you tried?
Could you be here by my side
I’ve loved you all through days and years
Loved you through all my falling tears
Oh! To feel the warmth of love
Soft and gentle as a dove
Could you love me if you tried?
Could you love me? Please! I cried.
I’m facing my demons
The fears that encroach
Terrified of battles
That each day invokes.
Night arrives swiftly
Twisting the sword
As seconds then drop
Into pools of my blood.
Can I capture time? Trap moments in a bottle and seal with a golden cork. Oh my darling with your lips on mine and your hips so fine and your tender caresses and your kisses of wine.
Oh my darling I love you so, could you ever really know? Would you ever know the love that flows, a stream that drowns my fears, that washes my tears, that carries me to you again and again and again.
I drown in my sorrow. The emptiness that covers me in black. I’m left with a pitch of death and no escape. My soul screams for love. My soul screams for help. I cry for you, oh my darling, oh my love. Where are you?
What would it mean
To see my mother again?
To speak for just an hour or few
We could share so much of
What has been, the days of now
We could speak of how the world has changed
Lives since gone and lives now new
Her dogs and cat and partner ceased
Oh mom – our family, our home now gone.
Oh mom, I miss you oh so much
Every day, every year I miss your touch
A mother’s hand a gift so kind
To every child that’s born
To every heart that beats
Oh mom, I have my own children now
Your grandchildren you would love so much
Oh mom – how I wish!
For you to be here once more
To be here again for another
Hour or few.
I was born in days
When candy was exchanged for
A coin grasped tightly in my hand.
Technology was years away
From being in every home in every land.
I was born in days where I could cycle
To friends and to the park.
I was born when eagles soared the sky
And we could stay outdoors after dark.
I grew up with parents still alive
And their parents
And their parents too.
I grew up with a sister to hold my
Hand.
I grew up with a sun in the sky
And a moon after dark.
I’m all grown up now.
The same sun is beating down
And our moon –
Our moon still comforts as time delivers
A glowing silver crown.
I cannot get the shape to fit, what am I doing wrong?
I press and push to no avail, it will not yield my touch.
Ponder, question, wonder why, how to bend the form to will?
It is not the shapes, my child, that need to change
They are set in shape and stone.
Take what you have, the clay and sand – and work the world around
Thoughts and hearts, minds and cares, and see the change abound.
One small piece, one at a time, build on solid ground.
And then one day, you will see, you will find –
The shapes all fit and beauty has been
Found.
Clouds will go
Clouds will come
Clouds will shadow
Clouds will rain.
There is nothing we need do
But to fall into the
Energy
That inspires us to change
Into something
New.
